Diary of a Wolfeman

Here’s a fun one-

Went to a customer’s house out by Reed College today. It took me almost a full half-hour just to find the place, despite having turn-by-turn instructions from Google Maps. Whoever designed the roads out there did so by following a drunken squirrel with no idea where he was going.

ME: knock knock
CUSTOMER:”Hello?”
ME: “Hi, I’m here to fix your computer. I understand you’re having trouble with the mouse and the audio.”
CUSTOMER:”Yes yes, come in. Here it is.”
ME: “Hmm…wireless.” wiggle wiggle wiggle. Pop open battery compartment. “When was the last time you replaced these batteries?”
CUSTOMER: “Uhm…never?”
ME: Swaps batteries. Wiggle wiggle. “That seems to have fixed that. Now for the audio.” Clickity-click click. “There we are, it was just muted – that multimedia button right there next to the minus key on the numpad must have gotten pressed.”
CUSTOMER: “Oh.”
ME: “Can I do anything else for you while I’m here?”
CUSTOMER: “No, I suppose that covers it.”
ME: “That’ll be $52.50”
CUSTOMER: Writes check
ME: Smiles and leaves.